Living a Lie

I was sleep, and I just had a weird thought that was so sharp it woke me up:

This applies to everyone and everything. Stop living a lie . Sometimes friends' advice means more to us than we think at the moment. I can't say how many times I've been told this...and the meaning of it lies right beneath the surface. Stop holding on to things thinking that they will change, or that you can adapt to them, because chances are, if you have to adapt, then there are just going to be several more changes to overcome down the road. Stop depending on a change that is not promised to you, in any given situation. Work, school, home-life, friendships, and intimate relationships.

Don't fool yourself.

D.A

Whoop, there it is .

In the end
Everyone ends up alone
Losing her
The only one who's ever known
Who I am
Who I'm not, who I wanna be
No way to know

How long she will be next to me

Forever is inexistant

Who the fuck came up with the word "infinity?" They need to be slapped, immediately.

Infinity does not exist in my world, and nothing lasts forever.

Golden Relationships

It took me 19 years to figure this out . . and I've been meaning to blog about this for the last week or so, and it just hit me when I was listening to this song .

There are so many people that call themselves my friends, best friends, sisters, bro's, etc. I've come to realize that most of these people aren't shit. It's really sucky, because nothing bad even happened for me to realize it. Out of all the hundreds of numbers in my phone, I can really only call a handful of people if I ever needed anything.

People right under my nose that only hit me up when they need something, when they want something, but never just to chill . .

OR

People that use me to get bitches. smh . Sad but true. Mar'tee who am I talking about? lol

Point of this blog really is just to tell you fucks that I cherrish the relationships I consider golden, because they are hard to find. Ceiren, Kyle, Eric, Jon, Dietrich, Justin P, Stevi, Elysse, Mar'tee, Samantha, Destinee, Gabi, Arielle, Kayla Bayla (even though we egged your moms car), Lauren, Karen F, Alexus, even though PDL be trippin.

P.S. Don't ask about the pic on the side lol . . I needed to add a pic alright. Back off .

I know I'm leaving some people out. . and I'm experiencing intense writer's block right now. To be continued. .

So realistic

I dare anyone to challenge me and tell me that these lyrics aren't the most accurate, realistic lyrics.

"Everybody's somebody's fool
The world is the biggest school
As you live, you learn though a torch will burn
Everybody's somebody's fool
You go through life making fools of others
Prentending you're giving them love
But remember sister or brother
You all have to answer to the one u above
It's beautiful to watch love begin
But oh so sad when it ends
As you got through life remember this rule
Everybody's somebody's fool"

Morgann is the lyrical queen who remembers any lyrics from ANY song. When I read these, I had to take them.

Everybody is somebody's fool- Ha.

-r.i.p M.J

Untitled.

People never realize when they are the problem. If the root of all unhappiness comes from one person, or thing, its quite evident that that particular person needs to be out of your life. With that being said, there's only one thing left to do...

..."every time I lose one, I bounce back with two"

This applies to no one or no relationship in particular. It's just a reflection a couple of different situations that have been occurring recently.

D.A

What a fucking bafoon

Today I encountered what I considered to be the most illiterate woman on the face of the planet. Not to sound at all full of myself, but my enhanced vocabulary and extensive level of education clearly differentiate me from your average 19 year old kid. Generally, I try not to let people know I am more intelligent than them, even if it is true. I find myself "dumbing down" when some people speak to me, because I don't want to make them feel inadequate.

As I walked into the probation office with a friend, I sat in a seat on the far side of the room. Since I had gotten nearly no sleep the past few nights, I laid my head down on the table and closed my eyes-in hopes of getting a quick nap while we were waiting for the paperwork to be processed. Ha, guess not. The door swings open and a woman with an extremely deep voice calls some parolees name and looks up and notices my briefs are showing. (only because I'm crouched over trying to get a fucking nap..meaning my shirt was lifting up). She yells in a loud monotone "young man you need to pull your pants up." So, I look up directly into her eyes and pretend she isn't standing there. She repeats herself, but this time even louder. I replied "uh, I'm not on probation, so why are you speaking to me as if I need something from you." The only reason I did pull my pants up is because my mother asked me to do it for her.

The point is- don't make the assumption that everyone who you encounter is the same type of person you are used to associating with. Don't speak to me as if I am your subordinate, because chances are, I can match you intellectually. Mind your fucking business, and I'll mind mine.

It sucks that people associate you with a certain group of people because of the way you look, dress, or even talk before they actually know you. I bet she did not guess I have a 4.0 huh? I love when people think so low of me because of the people I surround myself with, or the clothes I wear, or the things I say... the look on their face when I reveal my secondary personality is priceless.